Up until recently, I considered myself reasonably ethical. I recycle, I give to animal and children charities, I help others whenever and wherever it is needed, I do not eat animal products and i try to bring matters that i consider to be of importance to light via social media. But if i’m going to be brutally honest with myself, in order to be thoroughly ethical, i’d probably have to throw away most of my clothes which are primarily a result of child labour (I discovered, long after purchasing) along with my laptop and phone (damn it), I’d probably have to stop buying books because that resulted in god knows how many trees getting cut down. I’d most likely need to stop purchasing products from vegan companies that treat their employees appallingly (that story is for another day) I’d probably have to stop doing a number of things I enjoy if I really start scrutinising, questioning, and eventually realise that as much as I try to avoid it, everything I buy most likely supports a brand or company that in one way or another, is unethical, and if I want to be entirely ethical in the way I live, the only way to achieve that would be moving to an island somewhere and living in an entirely eco-friendly manner in which I relied on nothing but the earth for the necessities needed.
People have this funny way of applying their ethics and values, only when it suits them. For example, you may consider yourself to be more ethical because you’re a vegan. On the other hand, you may also be a complete and utter asshole of a person when it comes to how you treat people. Most vegans I know believe themselves to be god’s gift to mankind, yet they are too busy using the concept to promote themselves to be slapped back into reality and remember that it is about the Earth and the Animals and not their half naked instagram selfies or the lunch they just ate (To be entirely fair, there is absolutely nothing wrong in posting the occasional photo of your vegan lunch or even posting about it constantly, as long as you are entirely aware that it’s equally about the environment and the animals as it is about benefiting your social media platform). So what i’m saying is, If your motive isn’t right, then guess what….I guess you’re not all that ethical after all. You may consider yourself to be ethical because you treat people with kindness and consideration, but you still consume animal products, and you still use and therefore support mainstream brands such as Dove, Sensodyne, Always or Estee lauder. It is not uncommon that when i bring the rather critical matter to the attention of those who consider themselves to be animal lovers alerting them to the fact that these brands test on animals, they still use them. Pretty good example of choosing when not to apply one’s ethics for the sake of convenience. You may consider yourself to be ethical because you started a non-profit organisation in which you give women and children the opportunity to a better education and jobs, but when it comes to how you handle the treatment towards certain individuals in your life such as family, friends or those you have intimate relationships with, you may be absolutely appalling at behaving in a manner that is moral and kind towards these people, giving them the respect they deserve. I crossed paths with a young man a few months ago who fancied himself to be jesus reincarnated here to save all of man kind and in spite of the fact his internet persona exuded the impression of someone who was compassionate and genuinely concerned with the progression of humanity, in real life up front, he was everything opposite of what he appeared to be : Selfish, self-obsessed, a narcissist and primarily concerned in garnering attention for himself, not his cause, and devoid of any manners or graces in regard to how to treat others.
If there’s one outstanding feature i’ve noticed that we all seem to share in common, it’s being utterly delusional. Delusional about the fact we’re better, smarter, more successful than others. Delusional about the fact we’re more kindhearted, giving and compassionate than others. You see, we admire in others what we pride in ourselves. For example, if you make a ton of money, you’ll probably judge everybody else based on how much money they make and their entire self-worth as far as you are concerned may depend on their income alone. perhaps you may consider yourself to be rather spiritually enlightened, and will therefore tend to judge others based on how intellectual, profound, evolved, conscious and aware they are. Just because one is considerably more conscious and aware than the majority however, it does not mean one is excelling in other areas of ones life, and to be honest, the one thing that has probably allows anyone to vaguely excel in any area in the first place results in dropping our delusions of grandeur and checking in with our ego. That means, recognising exactly who we are without the filter. The really ugly, cringe worthy, unappealing traits we carry (the good as well but focusing on where one is falling short is how one improves and evolves in the first place). It means being brutally honest to the point where it feels cruel and debilitating. The minute we pop our bubble of delusions is the minute progress and achievement begin to take place. And that involves a hell of a lot of bubble popping because our bubble is constantly trying to grow back. It requires constant awareness and somedays our ego just takes over….and the awareness of self disappears into oblivion possibly never to reappear again unless we are willing to do some serious self-examining and drop the facade that protects us from believing we’re that much better than everybody else.
I do not believe it is intentional that we believe we are better, kinder, or more competent than others. It is merely a natural defence mechanism to protect our ego from the reality of feeling inadequate, insecure or less of value in comparison to someone who has done more charity work, has a more extensive CV, greater work experience or a long list of achievements. We tell ourselves little things that are an unrealistic perception of how others may see us such as “yes i’m physically more attractive than the average person” or “i’m far more intelligent and successful”. You may be wonderfully kind, you may also pride yourself on this characteristic, coupled with that however, you may also be phenomenally out of it, idealist and completely unrealistic, convinced that you are far more morally intact and worthy of praise than others (because you only happen to acknowledge the areas in your life in which you are excelling oppose to the areas in which you could improve which are always unpleasant to acknowledge because it is a reminder of how we might just possibly not be as awesome as we think we are) and delusional about where your life is heading : Example, I knew a man who was incredibly generous and a true gentleman but also thought he could make millions in the space of five years in spite of the fact he lacked the ambition, intelligence, intellect, experience, knowledge, education and basically, every possible characteristic needed to achieve such a feat, but somehow, he managed to convince himself that his religious beliefs would aid him in achieving the remarkable, that others, in spite of having business degrees and reasonably successful ventures, had not obtained. This is a dangerous level of delusion to have, believing the universe owes you something because you just happen to be more ethical, kind, moral, religious, whatever. Reality has a different story and sorry, but it will never be so pretty. You may be a fantastic business entrepreneur, but a horrible person to be in the company of, yet somehow manage to constantly create excuses as to why you repel everyone around you, why all your partners tend to break up with you and why your friends or family never want you to come visit. Do you get my drift? Our problem is not that we are not kind, generous, smart or successful enough, it’s that we’re far too busy creating this inner world of delusions and protecting our egos from the truth to recognise the vast amounts of improvements that could and MUST be made if we are to progress and become more whole and evolved as individuals.
To sum it up : We need to stop judging others based on the qualities we admire in ourselves which we then project onto them for falling short with, and instead, we need to step outside of our protective bubble shrouding our egos from facing up to the elements within ourselves that need improving, reconstructing, reassessing or entirely destroying. It is extremely liberating just admitting to ourselves that perhaps we’re not as wonderful as we believe ourselves to be, because the great news is, admitting it is the first step to becoming whatever it is we actually want to be, rather than residing in a pool of denial and never getting there, which is the reality for most of us simply because, we’re too busy focusing on appearing to be, rather than actually being. And I assure you, that the less delusional you are, the more likely you are to become the person you want.
About the author
Jwaydan Moyine is a classically trained Film Composer, Pianist, Cellist, Singer/Songwriter, and a Writer and Entrepreneur. She founded Earth Children to bring awareness to matters regarding the Environment, Animal welfare, Sustainable & Conscious living, Wellness & Humanitarian issues. She is heavily involved with activism for animal welfare in the UK and Egypt and child welfare in Syria, Thailand and Romania. She resides in Berkshire Running an organic food farm, an organic skincare company, bringing awareness to matters regarding the Planet, Plant based nutrition, Cruelty free living & the necessity of adapting to Veganism for the sake of Sustainability, Animal welfare and our Health. She has several qualifications in nutritional therapy, culinary medicine & holistic healing. You can find out more on what she is doing over at the Earth Children Facebook Page!
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